September

Now that the dust has settled, the pieces are starting to fall back into place after the most recent round of layoffs here at work. Its been quite a change, and definitely not one Im entirely thrilled by. JL and JN were let go, and my boss is leaving voluntarily. So, two of my favorite coworkers ever and the best boss Ive yet to have are gone. The lab is now shorthanded, and theres been an influx of work to conduct; plus they're looking to ramp up manufacturing downstairs for some product or another.

Having had some time to look at the choices that were made by HR, I have to question: why were these two let go?  The only reason I can come up with is the price of their salaries. However, they were two of the best people we had--- and I mean, the company got its moneys worth from them. No resting on their laurels for them.

The point being, the transition phase has been hard on those of us remaining. I spoke with JL and JN a few days ago, and theyre both really, truly happy to be free of this place. Their attitudes are remarkable, and I am jealous of their freedom. I feel fortunate to have a job, but I am envious of their 6 months free from work related stress.

Hello, August

Thank goodness August is here. This summer has been lost to me due to class, and with the advent of August, I have only two weeks more to go. Then, I can enjoy the delicious last gasp that is the last few weeks of summer free of class and free of homework. I might actually make it to the beach before midnight.

As I mentioned, this summer has been lost to me. The EMT-B class Ive been taking has been seriously draining. All spare moments not at work, have been devoted to this class. The worst part is that we're almost double the amount of time required by the state for certification. It has been extended for only-God knows what reason--- maybe the instructor's bored or lonely. I really dont care to speculate because all I know is that its killed my summer.

Some difficulties at work have sent me searching for another employer. Im sick of dealing with the wierd BS reasons Ive been reprimanded (putting down my honest results). I might be fired, but at least I know that I did what was right and honest. While Im not thrilled with this prospect, I will manage and it wont be the end of the world. All it does is cement my desire to leave and move to Hawaii.

Starting From Zero

I had surgery in the very early part of 2010 on my left knee. I had been ordered by my surgeon to stay off of it in August of '09, and a week after the incisions were made, she told me to stay off of it until July except for walking around associated with working. Emphatically: NO RUNNING until July.

Well, July is here. I started "running" again on the first day I was allowed to, and it felt heinous. Mentally, I know I am capable of faster, longer, easier runs than what I have been doing, so it has been grueling to stick to slow paces and short distances as I work back to where I was. Not entirely sure that I'll ever get back there, but I am trying.

Unfortunately, the going is slow, as is necessitated by the nature of my original injury and consequential surgery. I am thrilled to be up to 2 miles. I wish it were 22, but, its not. In the process of returning to my higher mileage/faster paced runs, Ill be learning how to lift again.

Lots of work in front of me. Im not too thrilled, but not too intimidated. I really enjoy a challenge, but this seems a little daunting.

Bummin'

After graduating with a B.S. in microbiology in 2006, I dreamt of attending the University of Hawaii at Manoa. I applied and was ready to go when they notified me that I had been declined admissions because my institution had sent the wrong person's transcripts to them not once, but twice. It took me a long time to move on, but I had to; I got a job, I got an apartment, I started a life.

The way things are right now, I am not guaranteed a job. (Not that I ever was.) It looks more and more certain that I will be laid off shortly, which is why the EMT-Basic program is a good thing. It allows me a chance to learn a new skill that I can use in the event that I lose my job.

The master plan since, oh, 2008, was to get to Hawaii. I am currently still on the east coast, and am exploring the possibility and realities of living there when I return in the fall. A big part of  that plan was to work as an EMT until I find something that pays better, and go back to school.

Well, today whilst I was perusing the UH website, I stumbled across the tuition rate. I probably should have checked that out earlier and all, but I didnt. Now it feels as if I have been kicked in the kidneys. I can literally feel my dreams slipping out of my fingers. I am really, truly bummed out. The cost is out of my range, unless I marry someone with deep pockets who wants to send me to school. It would be easier to just give up, and I am feeling like that might be the option I go with. I am already living with a lot of regret--- what's one more?

My finances are a shambles already, though theyre not nearly as bad as some people's. Im grateful for everything and everyone I have in my life; I just wonder if its enough for me to be happy with?

EMT Stuff

I get that when youre learning to be an EMT, and when youre a working EMT too, that youre gonna have to actually touch people. Really, I get that. I am not opposed to that.

HOWEVER

I AM opposed to people touching ME.

Class on Saturday was horrendous. If I never have to be splinted again ever it will be too soon. It really wasnt necessary to have someone prod me in the bum to try to find the bone in my ass. It was really less than pleasant and a hell of a lot more than just "awkward."

Saturday was a less than enjoyable day, and thus I am extremely grateful to be back to my real job in the chemistry lab. No one manhandles me here. Sheesh...

Lake Champlain

Further Proof...

...that its fate for me to go back to Hawaii? The dream I had last night was pretty indicative that I am meant to relocate there. I dreamt that I was happy, working as an EMT while studying for my master's degree in nursing. (Just go with it; details aren't important.) It was close to tangible. I could smell the coffee as I walked by the Kona Coffee Company. I could feel the sand between my toes, and the breeze on my skin. Lovely.